Things I have learnt that don’t seem to be any use
and are straight out frustrating.
Last week I wrote a completely ranty newsletter, and then didn’t post it. I felt it was too ranty and perhaps I just needed to get it out on paper. I also felt like the universe hit back, because Tuesday afternoon my younger son got hit by a car cycling home from school (it was his fault and I felt sorry for the driver, who along with the police kindly didn’t press charges).
My son is fine apart from breaking his arm and cracking the bottom half of his front tooth off, that cost $600 to fix less the portion ACC and our health insurance covered). I know it’s wrong but all I could think about was the thousands of dollars spent on dental surgery and orthodontics to make his teeth look straight and nice. His Dad just wanted to know if his bicycle was ok.
This week I have more content to go with that completely ranty post, so I went back to read it and see how bad it was.
It actually wasn’t too bad so I adjusted a few things, added some extra stuff, and here it is:
“There I was in bed last night, trying to work out where my 9.30am in-person meeting tomorrow was supposed to be, so I could set my alarm. The invitee hadn’t put the location in the calendar invite so I was on my phone trawling back through emails, and then LinkedIn messages to work it out.
I then sent a LinkedIn message to said person confirming I would see them at the agreed location and time. Two things I knew from this:
The meeting would be cancelled even though the other person reached out to ask for the meeting, and
It would likely be a meeting to “pick my brain” and “get some ideas” but not actually give me any work.
Sure enough, just over 30 minutes later I got a cancellation message.
It made me realise that I have developed many skills and knowledge that are really no use to anyone. These include:
I know when someone is going to cancel a meeting before they cancel it. I just do. There are usually good and valid reasons, but I know anyway.
I know when someone is not going to turn up to an online meeting. It’s some kind of sixth sense I have. I once had a person not turn up to the first online meeting they scheduled through my calendar app, then apologise, reschedule and not turn up to the second meeting. I couldn’t be bothered replying to the second email with all the excuses about why they couldn’t turn up.
I know that when my husband gives an estimated time dinner will be ready, it will be at least an hour past the estimated time.
I know when someone is going to attempt to sell me something if I accept their LinkedIn request. I guess this is an easy one. They usually have “SEO Consultant” or “Email Marketing” in their LinkedIn profile. It seems like there is a glut of people doing this kind of work.
OR if I accept a LinkedIn request I’m going to get some stupid AI generated response. Here’s an example from today I woke up to “Your background immediately stood out to me because it combines something I don’t often see together at the same depth: executive operational reality and genuine human clarity. Also appreciated your “Just. Stop. It.” piece. Especially the recognition that people quietly normalize unsustainable patterns until exhaustion starts masquerading as professionalism. There’s a lot of truth in that.” #KillMe
Clients who want an “urgent” proposal won’t reply to my email for at least 2 weeks and there is an eighty percent chance they will completely ghost me.
Going to work at a café (because it can be lonely working at home, and the cat is annoying) will guarantee there will at least be two groups of men talking loudly about absolute crap that no one else wants to hear about, but everyone in the café is forced to listen to anyway. We all just learnt that one man has a haircut soon. No one cares dude!
If you have had a bad experience with a client previously, it is VERY likely you will have a similar experience in the future so I shouldn’t engage with them. Even though I know this, I continue to be optimistic. Why??
Meeting with people who do similar or adjacent work to me rarely never turns into work.
The larger the client company, the more frustrting it is to be set up as a vendor, and the longer it takes to get paid.
But then there are some good experiences that I sometimes forget about. These include:
Lovely people who refer you to other lovely people for connections and work
People who comment and share your LinkedIn posts
Clients who will provide you with the best testimonials, if you just ask them.
People attending your events
Sometimes wishing for something (the modern term being “manifest”) can make things actually happen. For example today I’m recording a podcast with someone I have admired for so long. I’m excited and nervous.
What’s some stuff you just know?
Lisa xx